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THE ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER, CLASSIC VERSION
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's
a fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food
or shelter so he dies out in the cold.
THE ANT AND THE GRASSHOPPER, MODERN VERSION
The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his
house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a
fool and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands
to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others
are cold and starving.
CBS, NBC and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper
next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food.
America is stunned by the sharp contrast. How can this be, that in a country of
such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so?
Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries
when they sing "It's Not Easy Being Green."
Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant's house where the news
stations film the group singing "We shall overcome". Jesse then has the group
kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper's sake.
Al Gore exclaims in an interview with Peter Jennings that the ant has gotten
rich off the back of the grasshopper, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the
ant to make him pay his "fair share".
Finally, the EEOC drafts the "Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act",
retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to hire
a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay his
retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.
Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation
suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges that
Bill appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients.
The ant loses the case.
The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the ant's
food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's
old house, crumbles around him because he doesn't maintain it.
The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a
drug-related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang
of spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.
MORAL OF THE STORY: Vote Republican.
Social Security (source unknown)
Something to remember when you hear/read about Social Security.
Q: Who and which party took Social Security from an independent fund and put
it in the general fund so that Congress could spend it?
A: It was Lyndon Johnson and the Democratic-controlled House and Senate.
Q: Which party put a tax on Social Security?
A: The Democratic party.
Q: Which party increased the tax on Social Security?
A: The Democratic Party with Al Gore casting the deciding vote.
Q: Which party decided to give your Social Security money to immigrants?
A: That's right, the Democratic Party. Immigrants who move into this country
at age 65 get SSI even though they have never paid a dime into the system.
This is costing us millions of dollars/year.
After doing all this, the Democrats tell us that the Republicans want to
take our Social Security away from us. The worst part about it is that
people forget who did what to whom!
I am a senior citizen.
During the Clinton Administration I had an extremely good and
a well paying job.
I took numerous vacations and had several vacations homes.
Since President Bush took office, I have watched my entire life change for
the worse. I lost my job. I lost my two sons in that terrible Iraqi War. I
lost my homes. I lost my health insurance. As a matter of fact, I lost
virtually everything and became homeless.
Adding insult to injury, when the authorities found me living like an
animal, instead of helping me, they arrested me.
I will do anything to insure President Bush's defeat in the next election.
I will do anything that Senator Kerry wants, to insure that a Democrat is
back in the White House come next year. Bush has to go.
I just thought you and your readers would like to know how one senior
citizen views the Bush Administration. Thank you for taking the time to
read my letter.
Sincerely,
Sadaam Hussein
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If you really believe that President BUSH lied
THAT THERE NEVER WERE ANY WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION IN IRAQ AND HE TOOK US TO WAR SOLELY FOR HIS OIL BUDDIES - - then read this and, if you are the fair minded person that I believe you to be - - PASS IT ON TO YOUR ENTIRE E-MAIL LIST.
"One way or the other, we are determined to deny Iraq the capacity to develop weapons of mass destruction and the missiles to deliver them. That is our bottom line."
President Clinton, Feb. 4, 1998
If Saddam rejects peace and we have to use force, our purpose is clear.
We want to seriously diminish the threat posed by Iraq's weapons of mass destruction program."
President Clinton, Feb. 17, 1998
"Iraq is a long way from USA but, what happens there matters a great deal here. For the risks that the leaders of a rogue state will use nuclear, chemical or biological weapons against us or our allies is the greatest security threat we face."
Madeline Albright, Feb 18, 1998
"He will use those weapons of mass destruction again, as he has ten times since 1983."
Sandy Berger, Clinton National Security Adviser, Feb, 18, 1998
"We urge you, after consulting with Congress, and consistent with the U.S. Constitution and Laws, to take necessary actions, (including, if appropriate, air and missile strikes on suspect Iraqi sites) to respond effectively to the threat posed by Iraq's refusal to end its weapons of mass destruction programs."
Letter to President Clinton, signed by Sens. Carl Levin, Tom Daschle, John Kerry, and others Oct. 9, 1998
"Saddam Hussein has been engaged in the development of weapons of mass destruction technology which is a threat to countries in the region and he has made a mockery of the weapons inspection process."
Rep. Nancy Pelosi (D, CA), Dec. 16, 1998
"Hussein has ... chosen to spend his money on building weapons of mass destruction and palaces for his cronies."
Madeline Albright, Clinton Secretary of State, Nov. 10, 1999
"There is no doubt that ... Saddam Hussein has invigorated his weapons programs. Reports indicate that biological, chemical and nuclear programs continue a pace and may be back to pre-Gulf War status. In addition, Saddam continues to redefine delivery systems and is doubtless using the cover of a licit missile program to develop longer-range missiles that will threaten the United States and our allies."
Letter to President Bush, Signed by Sen. Bob Graham (D, FL,) and others, December 5, 2001
"We begin with the common belief that Saddam Hussein is a tyrant and a threat to the peace and stability of the region. He has ignored the mandated of the United Nations and is building weapons of mass destruction and the means of delivering them."
Sen. Carl Levin (D, MI), Sept. 19, 2002
"We know that he has stored secret supplies of biological and chemical weapons throughout his country."
Al Gore, Sept. 23, 2002
"Iraq's search for weapons of mass destruction has proven impossible to deter and we should assume that it will continue for as long as Saddam is in power." Al Gore, Sept. 23, 2002
"We have known for many years that Saddam Hussein is seeking and developing weapons of mass destruction."
Sen. Ted Kennedy (D, MA), Sept. 27, 2002
"The last UN weapons inspectors left Iraq in October of 1998. We are confident that Saddam Hussein retains some stockpiles of chemical and biological weapons, and that he has since embarked on a crash course to build up his chemical and biological warfare capabilities. Intelligence reports indicate that he is seeking nuclear weapons..."
Sen. Robert Byrd (D, WV), Oct. 3, 2002
"I will be voting to give the President of the United States the authority to use force-- if necessary-- to disarm Saddam Hussein because I believe that a deadly arsenal of weapons of mass destruction in his hands is a real and grave threat to our security."
Sen. John F. Kerry (D, MA), Oct. 9, 2002
"There is unmistakable evidence that Saddam Hussein is working aggressively to develop nuclear weapons and will likely have nuclear weapons within the next five years ... We also should remember we have always underestimated
the progress Saddam has made in development of weapons of mass destruction." Sen. Jay Rockefeller (D, WV), Oct 10, 2002
"He has systematically violated, over the course of the past 11 years, every significant UN resolution that has demanded that he disarm and destroy his chemical and biological weapons, and any nuclear capacity. This he has refused to do" Rep.
Henry Waxman (D, CA), Oct. 10, 2002
"In the four years since the inspectors left, intelligence reports show that Saddam Hussein has worked to rebuild his chemical and biological weapons stock, his missile delivery capability, and his nuclear program. He has also given aid, comfort, and sanctuary to terrorists, including al Qaeda members. It is clear, however, that if left unchecked, Saddam Hussein will continue to increase his capacity to wage biological and chemical warfare, and will keep trying to develop nuclear weapons."
Sen. Hillary Clinton (D, NY), Oct 10, 2002
"We are in possession of what I think to be compelling evidence that Saddam Hussein has, and has had for a number of years, a developing capacity for the production and storage of weapons of mass destruction."
Sen. Bob Graham (D, FL), Dec. 8, 2002
"Without question, we need to disarm Saddam Hussein. He is a brutal, murderous dictator, leading an oppressive regime. He presents a particularly grievous threat because he is so consistently prone to miscalculation ... And now he is miscalculating America's response to his continued deceit and his consistent grasp for weapons of mass destruction. So the threat of Saddam Hussein with weapons of mass destruction is real."
Sen. John F. Kerry (D, MA), Jan.23.2003
SO NOW THE DEMOCRATS SAY PRESIDENT BUSH LIED, THAT THERE NEVER WERE ANY WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION AND HE TOOK US TO WAR FOR HIS OIL BUDDIES???
How "convenient"...this being an election year and all!! |
REPUBLICANISM SHOWN TO BE GENETIC IN ORIGIN
David Gordon
The discovery that affiliation with the Republican Party is genetically
determined was announced by scientists in the current issue of the journal
NURTURE, causing uproar among traditionalists who believe it is a chosen
lifestyle. Reports of the gene coding for political conservatism, discovered
after a decades-long study of quintuplets in Orange County, CA, has sent
shock waves through the medical, political, and golfing communities.
Psychologists and psychoanalysts have long believed that Republicans'
unnatural disregard for the poor and frequently unconstitutional tendencies
resulted from dysfunctional family dynamics -- a remarkably high percentage
of Republicans do have authoritarian domineering fathers and emotionally
distant mothers who didn't teach them how to be kind and gentle. Biologists
have long suspected that conservatism is inherited. "After all," said one
author of the NURTURE article, "It's quite common for a Republican to have a
brother or sister who is a Republican." The finding has been greeted with
relief by Parents and Friends of Republicans (PFREP), who sometimes blame
themselves for the political views of otherwise lovable children, family,
and unindicted co-conspirators.
One mother, a longtime Democrat, wept and clapped her hands in ecstasy on
hearing of the findings. "I just knew it was genetic," she said, seated with
her two sons, both avowed Republicans. "My boys would never freely choose
that lifestyle!" When asked what the Republican lifestyle was, she said,
"You can just tell watching their conventions in Houston and San Diego on
TV: the flaming xenophobia, flamboyant demagogy, disdain for anyone not
rich, you know." Both sons had suspected their Republicanism from an early
age but did not confirm it until they were in college, when they became
convinced it wasn't just a phase they were going through.
The NURTURE article offered no response to the suggestion that the high
incidence of Republicanism among siblings could result from their sharing
not only genes but also psychological and emotional attitude as products of
the same parents and family dynamics. A remaining mystery is why many
Democrats admit to having voted Republican at least once -- or often dream
or fantasize about doing so. Polls show that three out of five adult
Democrats have had a Republican experience, although most outgrow teenage
experimentation with Republicanism.
Some Republicans hail the findings as a step toward eliminating
conservophobia. They argue that since Republicans didn't "choose" their
lifestyle any more than someone "chooses" to have a ski-jump nose, they
shouldn't be denied civil rights which other minorities enjoy. If
conservatism is not the result of stinginess or orneriness (typical
stereotypes attributed to Republicans) but is something Republicans can't
help, there's no reason why society shouldn't tolerate Republicans in the
military or even high elected office -- provided they don't flaunt their
political beliefs. For many Americans, the discovery opens a window on a
different future. In a few years, gene therapy might eradicate Republicanism
altogether. But should they be allowed to marry? |
| Worst president in history?
The following appeared in the Durham, NC local paper as a letter to the editor. Please forward to all on your list as this will put things in perspective:
Liberals claim President Bush shouldn't have started this war. They complain about his prosecution of it. One liberal recently claimed Bush was the worst president in U.S. history. Let's clear up one point: We didn't start the war on terror. Try to remember, it was started by terrorists BEFORE 9/11. Let's look at the "worst" president and mismanagement claims.
- FDR led us into World War II. Germany never attacked us: Japan did. From 1941-1945, 450,000 lives were lost, an average of 112,500 per year.
- Truman finished that war and started one in Korea, North Korea never attacked us. From 1950-1953, 55,000 lives were lost, an average of 18,333 per year.
- John F. Kennedy started the Vietnam conflict in 1962. Vietnam never attacked us. Johnson turned Vietnam into a quagmire. From 1965-1975, 58,000 lives were lost, an average of 5,800 per year.
- Clinton went to war in Bosnia without UN or French consent, Bosnia never attacked us. He was offered Osama bin Laden's head on a platter three times by Sudan and did nothing. Osama has attacked us on multiple occasions.
In the two years since terrorists attacked us, President Bush has liberated two countries, crushed the Taliban, crippled al-Qaida, put nuclear inspectors in Lybia, Iran and North Korea without firing a shot, and captured a terrorist who slaughtered 300,000 of his own people. We lost 600 soldiers, an average of 300 a year. Bush did all this abroad while not allowing another terrorist attack at home. Worst president in history? Come on!
The Democrats are complaining about how long the war is taking, but... It took less time to take Iraq than it took Janet Reno to take the Branch Davidian compound. That was a 51 day operation. We've been looking for evidence of chemical weapons in Iraq for less time than it took Hillary Clinton to find the Rose Law Firm billing records. It took less time for the 3rd Infantry Division and the Marines to destroy the Medina Republican Guard than it took Teddy Kennedy to call the police after his Oldsmobile sank at Chappaquiddick.
It took less time to take Iraq than it took to count the votes in Florida!!!!
PASS IT ON.
Here's my strategy on the Cold War: We win, they lose."
- Ronald Reagan
"The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help."
- Ronald Reagan
"The trouble with our liberal friends is not that they're ignorant: It's just that they know so much that isn't so."
- Ronald Reagan
"Of the four wars in my lifetime none came about because the US was too strong."
- Ronald Reagan
"I have wondered at times about what the Ten Commandment's would have looked like if Moses had run them through the US Congress."
- Ronald Reagan
"The taxpayer: That's someone who works for the federal government but doesn't have to take the civil service examination."
- Ronald Reagan
"Government is like a baby: An alimentary canal with a big appetite at one end and no sense of responsibility at the other."
- Ronald Reagan
"If we ever forget that we're one nation under God, then we will be a nation gone under."
- Ronald Reagan
"The nearest thing to eternal life we will ever see on this earth is a government program."
- Ronald Reagan
"I've laid down the law, though, to everyone from now on about anything that happens: no matter what time it is, wake me, even if it's in the middle of a Cabinet meeting."
- Ronald Reagan
"It has been said that politics is the second oldest profession. I have learned that it bears a striking resemblance to the first."
- Ronald Reagan
"Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it."
- Ronald Reagan
"Politics is not a bad profession. If you succeed there are many rewards, if you disgrace yourself you can always write a book."
- Ronald Reagan
"No arsenal, or no weapon in the arsenals of the world, is so formidable as the will and moral courage of free men and women.
- Ronald Reagan
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Note: Opinions expressed in any of the material list on this page are not necessarily the opinions of the individuals of the Ramsey Republican Club (RRC). They are provided as a means of making interesting, provocative and humorous information available for your reading pleasure. Information noted within this page has not been researched nor confirmed by anyone representing the RRC. The RRC is not responsible for inaccurate or misinterpreted information noted on this page.
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